In most cases, California courts will allow parents to share custody of their children. Alternatively, they may allow parents to have generous visitation rights in lieu of physical custody of their sons or daughters. However, despite the fact that a child will likely retain relationships with both parents, divorce is still a significant change in his or her life. You can start the healing process by having an honest discussion with your son or daughter about what to expect going forward.
Don’t share too much information
There is no need to mention the fact that your former partner’s love of alcohol was the reason for the divorce. Furthermore, there is no need to mention your partner’s shopping habits or his or her unwillingness to clean the house. As a general rule, all that will do is undermine this person’s standing as an authority figure in the eyes of your child. Furthermore, badmouthing your former spouse may make it difficult to develop the type of relationship necessary to raise a son or daughter after a divorce.
Make it clear that your kids did nothing wrong
Your children may feel as if they did something to cause the divorce to occur. It’s critical that you do whatever it takes to relieve your kids of this burden. For example, it may be a good idea to talk about divorce as a family. This allows your kids to hear both parents acknowledge that they have no control over what adults decide to do.
An attorney may be able to suggest ways to make a divorce easier on your children. For instance, this individual may recommend that you negotiate a settlement through mediation instead of litigation. Doing so may prevent them from being exposed to a potentially toxic event.